Yikes I changed the look of my blog… oh no…. its DIFFERENT!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yes I am in a strangly odd mood. Amazing what a weekend away from your own place can do to you.
I feel at peace with the world, isn’t that wonderful? Ok maybe not wonderful to everyone, and to some of you, I may sound just plain barfy. I am sure this feeling will change around 6:30 tomorrow morning when my alarm rings for work (Ick, monday) but right now, I am strangely at peace with the world.
I spent the weekend at my Meemos dog sitting. It was nice. I like her house, I feel safe and comfortable there. Its a nice feeling, almost like I have finally come home. Besides, she has a really, really comfy bed. Its nice to get away sometimes. I know it isn’t really away per say, but I didn’t have to stress about all the things I should be doing. I could actually concentrate on the things that I could be doing, like homework. I didn’t have to sit and stress out about I should be cleaning this, or I need to go grocery shopping, none of that. I could just relax.
I sometimes still find it hard to believe that this is really happening to me. It has only been five months, sometimes it feels like a blink, others it feels like forever. Six months ago I didn’t even know who my biological mother was, I didn’t know anything about her, and now I was sleeping in her house. Taking care of her animals. Feeding her lizards (I like the lizards, just not their food) totally yucky disgusting creepy crawly centipede worm things that totally grossed me out. Those damn lizards had better appreciate their dinner, I don’t do creepy crawly critters with little creepy legs. We definitely DONT have that in common! (one thing we do have in common is our need to take our own pillows wherever we go)
I was looking at some pictures that were left out near the lizard cages, and marveling at how much the woman really is like me. Pictures with big snakes ( I do LOVE snakes) and lemurs (yes she held a lemur) and petting a mountain lion. Pictures of my brothers growing up. Pictures of her, that despite the time, age and looks difference still looked like me. Hair that is similar to mine, eyes, freckles… Its just unreal to me sometimes. The biological traits that make us who we are.
So she gets home, and I start packing up my things… trying to shove my pillow and my blanket in the bag with all my laundry, which her boyfriend looked at like… you packed all that for a weekend? And she hands me a little bag. How cute, she got me something from Corning. I open it, half expecting a corning refrigerator magnet or something (which would have been cool) and I pull out a green eggs and ham postcard and two candles and a candle holder. Ok, you are probably thinking… sounds….. fantastic…. ummm…. Let me explain. First of all this postcard is no normal postcard, its like this raised rubber thing, hard to explain, totally cool. And its green eggs and ham!!! I work in a childcare, friday was Dr. Suess’ birthday. I spent the day reading Dr. Suess books and was telling my Meemo about it. Told her if I had to read one more green eggs and ham, I was going to scream (or something along those lines) In reality I like green eggs and ham, you can only just handle so much. But it was just the coolest freaking thing, for her to find this cool little green eggs and ham postcard to get me. The two candles…. They are greenhouse scented candles. I have never seen greenhouse scented candles, but I LOVE them. LOOOOOVVVVVEEEE them. In case I never said, there is a conservatory (AKA greenhouse) in a park called highland park in the city I live in. I love orchids, and I LOVE the conservatory, its my favorite place in the world, and my absolute FAVORITE smell. I have often gone in there and wished I could bottle the scent, I love it there. It is my peaceful place, my spiritual place. I now have candles that smell like that. And for her to KNOW that… Just cool. Totally, totally cool. Now I can have that scent wherever I am. Turn up the heat, burn my candle, and pretend I am there. Awesome!