A moment in a thought

My thoughts, in my life, of adoption and other such things

Just a note to add May 17, 2007

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jessie @ 10:15 pm

Just a little note to add to my previous blog entry….

I guess I forget that none of you really know me, don’t know where I have come from, or where I have been.  The fact that I CAN be happy is a bit of a miracle. 

I am happier, more well adjusted and better feeling than I have been in years and years.  I am also no more depressed than I ever have been.  Anyone who has ever dealt with true depression knows that even a day out of it is a good day. 

I have a great many good days, a great many.  I am more ok now than I have been in a long, long time.  Its just those little dark places, I see them, I recognize them.  Sometimes I can even talk myself out of them.  I experience a million other moods along the way. 

I guess I am just fed up with those that come out of no where.  However, dealing with BPD is a long road, one I have traveled for a long time. 

And thank goodness, one I have come a long way on.  One that I have finally seen a lot more brighter days 🙂

Its just those pesky pissy Eeyore moods that get in the way!   But Eeyore is cute, I can handle being an Eeyore some days 🙂


4 Responses to “Just a note to add”

  1. joy21 Says:

    I think the best thing for me has been to accept where I am, when I am.

    If that makes sense. A book that has really helped me is “Start Where You Are” by Pema Chodron.

    There is a self-agression in self-improvement. I really think the key is to love who you are NOW. Have compassion for you now.

    You have been through a lot, you try so hard. YOU ARE A GOOD PERSON. Right now, take it easy on yourself.

    You don’t sound the least bit morose to me. You are a hard worker, you are empathetic. You are wonderfully you.

  2. Anonomous Says:

    Thank you Joy, thanks so much.
    I do work hard, some days I think I just get tired of working!!
    I like your suggestion, and I think I might check out that book. I think its important for me to accept who I am without all the judgement. Its just so hard for me not to judge myself when I feel so judged by others.
    However, I guess I have to learn that what other people think isn’t nearly as important as what I think.


    (I can’t comment signed in for some reason, wordpress doesn’t like me)

  3. Elizabeth Says:

    Jessie I agree with what you said about just one day out of a depression is a good day. I live for those good days!

    Yes you were given up, and so was I. I’m a lot older than you are, and I’m still not OK with it. I will never be OK with it, but that doesn’t mean there is anything wrong with me, nor does it mean I’m wallowing in misery.

    I think you are much too hard on yourself.

    I think what you are going through is perfectly normal.

    Adoption is crap, but we are survivors. We lost our entire families, and lived to tell the tale.

  4. mia Says:

    I love Eeyore. I’m Eeyore some days too although I really love Poohs take on the world. I think I would love to be like Winnie the Pooh.

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